L plays the race card

This is the post I have been dreading. It's that touchy issue of race that has permeated every day of my internship here, but I have tried to avoid. So I'm going to be as frank and candid as I can.

All of our clients are black. Most of them are young and many have spent the majority of their lives in jail. There's a joke that everyone knows the exact number of white inmates at the jail (last I heard, seven out of more than a thousand inmates). The district is as divided racially as it is economically, and along the same lines. You know exactly when it is you've crossed from black to white neighborhoods even without looking at the people; the pavement beneath your feet, the trash on the streets, the buildings beside you... everything clues you in on the lines this city has drawn.

To the people I meet, I'm white (which is odd, because I've never been white before.) But white isn't really a skin color here, it's a way of life. Just like black is. Racial tensions run high here, making every encounter a racial one. Sometimes I feel like shouting, "Look at me! I'm not white! I'm not the enemy!" But, in all the ways that matter here, I am.

Before this internship, I was furiously opposed to affirmative action based on race, for all the basic reasons and traditional arguments. Today... I'm not so sure where I stand. It's an uneasy feeling-- not knowing where you stand on most issues--but, quite frankly, the world is never still, and I'm glad I finally understand it's OK to move with it.

Maybe the politicians that we so often accuse of flip-flopping are not spineless panderers, but simply wise, because they learn and change with every experience.